Hello! So, initially, I had started writing this post a few days ago. The more I write about social media, the more afraid I get of “failing” as a blogger. Anyway, being hip was never really my thing. Today, I am trying to offer a different conversation and approach to social media. The discussion blossomed once I listened to this TED talk.
I have started using the Internet when I was in my teens. For the longest time, I was isolated because of my mental illness. Then, I was in this limbo of talking to people, but not really connecting.
Social media, to me, has strongly affected my sense of connection. All day, I keep checking my Twitter, my Instagram, my Tumblr, even Facebook (and who the heck is on that?).
People keep posting about how great their lives are. Everything is perfect (or, on the flip side, there is the catastrophic thinking posts about how the world is out to get us, how doomed we are, how life sucks).
Truthfully, I get very lonely when I watch people’s living while I am stuck at home. I find myself fixated, addicted, to hearing other people’s stories that I do not get to live my own life anymore.
Losing best friend
In addition, the very strange thing is that I no longer can handle being alone with myself. For me, that is the biggest tragedy, because people will come and go. I only have myself to cherish. Yes, I know this does not sound nice, but it truly feels like my own relationship with myself and with my creator/universe is at a huge disadvantage.
One of the issues with social media, to me, is the way everything feels so curated and rehearsed. It’s like we’ve become entertainers, putting on a show (It can be of anything: hyper sexuality, manic depression, self harm, even happiness is made into a looped Vine).
The issues I noticed with the Internet is that people say things for attention, and not really for connecting. If you don’t say the “right” things, if you are not funny and charming, witty, sarcastic, and jaded, people unfollow you.
Or, better yet, some people idolize others. I know I do that often. In my head, I paint perfect pictures of people (say that ten times fast, go!). Like, there are people who get perfect numbers of likes with every post. It feels like if I copy a certain group of people, if I tune into their dialogue and humor, somehow I’ll be more effective as a writer.
So, I am going to slowly cut down on social media. I am posting relevant ideas on the Internet. You don’t need to hear about how sad I am for the millionth time. If you feel curious, you can ask. However, I do not want to spend my time asking for attention.
It is time for me to pay attention to myself, to my worship, to my work. Does this mean I’m gone from social media? No, not at all. I just want to tweak what I do say, how I communicate so that it is truthful and honest.
Honestly, I am aware that this is going to be a process. I just want to focus on myself and my impact on the world. This doesn’t mean I’m going to fake happiness in any way, but I can at least control what I share and say/portray in my life.
Life is too short to live waiting for things to happen. I truly believe that my life will be much healthier in the long run.
Warning: I am not judging you for how you use the internet. Simply put, I am discussing my journey and summoning a shift in my perception of my socializing online.